Archive for August, 2009

My intestine is 7.5 mtrs long, what about yours ?

SO I live in a country where all the heads in the room will turn simultaneously towards you only because you uttered the MOST unusual – uncommon word- I am a “Vegetarian”. Yup , I live in Singapore now. Finally found a job, jajajajajajaj (english:hahahahahah) . 😀  Everything is good. Almost everything. Good work place, it’s got a pool table, my new addiction! An exhausting pantry , only one train stop from my house! most importantly one of the best companies ever! BUT, I will go as hungry as an empty car stuck in a dessert with not a single gas station within even 5 kms of radius. It is So hard to find a vegetarian restraunt here. You do ofcourse find dozens in “Little India”-which is a replica of India. But Indian food is by far the only purely vegtarian cuisine you can find here.

So after lunching together, my colleagues and I starting havign a conversation about food and which cuisine was their favorite , which food item was delicious and which animal was mouth-watering tasty!!! At that time I froze to what I was hearing.  They were discussing which parts of the animal meat were tastier than the rest! Apparently in Phillipines, nothing goes to the trash. So they decide to finish up even the BONE marrows! Holy cow!  So then our conversation grew gross-er and I then decided to write something about it that I would like to share. Some SENSE , that is .

Man was always termed as the top of the food chain. Meaning he was “Omnivorous”. So he eats everything from plants to animals. Right? Wrong!  and here is why..

I want to introduce to you some terms that some of you may not be familiar with. So the eating habits are categorized as
1. Herbivores : (Primary food) Equipped to handle raw leaf/ grass  : (animal species) the grazers;Cow, sheep..etc,.
2. Grainivores : Raw grains of various grasses : Birds
3. Frugivores : thrive mostly on raw fruits, succulent fruit-like vegetables, roots, shoots, nuts and seeds : Apes, Gorillas, Chimpanzees,monkeys etc,.
4.Insectivores : thrive on insects : ant-eaters(obviously!), amphibians etc,.
5.Carnivores: eat raw meat : cats, lions, tigers, wolves etc,.
6. Omnivores : Everything from plants to animals.

If you believe in Darwin’s evolution along with many others’ , you should come to a logical conclusion that we may categorize ourselves under the Frugivores ’cause our ancestors are up there. But we have not even seen the term in our Bio text books or even from the lecturers! (bet they love the chicken breast!). But It’s true.

Ill try and eliminate what we are not. We cannot be herbivores cause our intestines are not long enough / can’t digest raw plant fibres like the way cows do. (Have you every noticed cows bringing up their half chewed stuff back up to the mouth to chew them more and then swallow them..ewwww…But yea, it takes that long an intestine and that much chewing , you see!). Nor do we have a long neck to reach up to trees / tall branches.

We cannot be grainevores either ’cause we dont have beaks to break open the nuts/grains.

We cannot be insectivores, (unless you were born south-east Asian).Thankfully, half  (or more?) of the female population freaks out at the sight of roaches and bees!

We are not carnivores ’cause , ok this bit is interesting.

1.Now these guys can run really really fast to catch hold of their preys. We cant.No you can’t even over-take your house cat!
2.They have sharp canines to grab hold of the meat and tear those layers of tissues. And I know some people will quickly want to answer ” Oh we have knives and forks and axes” and stuff. FAIL. You just can’t eat them without any external effort if you were thrown in an island!
3. Their intestine. It’s 3-5 times the length of their body, which is much smaller than our’s (Cows have an intestine roughly 30 times the length of their body!) The reason they have small ones is because if the meat stays in the body too long it becomes toxic. Also carnivores animals produce highly acidic gastric juices in order to  digest the meat faster , effectively and reduce the chances of it intoxicating. I read somewhere that the excreta of cats and the sorts have unbearable smell! yuack thu.
4. They produce enzymes that will eliminate the presence of Uric acid. Since we don’t we tend to absorb them and its as good as storing poison in our body !
5. you know the above 4 should really be enough for you to stop eating animals! The only reason human race started having meat was because some random region in the world faced a famine and we turned to the animals as a source of food.

Do you also realise we have a nice set of fingers to grab hold of fruits and vegtables , apart from your ditcher friend’s neck when they turn up late for a movie!

So when people want to get back at animal rights activists, they ask why do you get offended when we kill animals, you kill plants too. And besides we are not hunting in the forest to catch hold of animals, that you may worry about their extinction.We breed them. well? LAME!  How long do you think you can ‘breed’ animals and kill them to eat. You people are not enough with one turkey sizzler per meal! It takes one male and one female and a couple of months to produce ONE off-spring. Twins are a rare chance. It’s not meant to be. Nature speaks to you, you know? Don’t like that line? clichéd? well, nature is slapping at you the naked truth and common sense. So wake up and stop eating what you are not supposed. Or else…..somebody gonna get a real bad hurt. Oh well, you Die actually! With all weird diseases. Like, the Swine flu. Im sure no muslim died of that! They were smart not to eat Pork, thank God, literally! I mean, seems like human race got tired of getting sick from the usual diseases, so they started picking up diseases from the animals.

So STOP looking at vegetarians with astonishment for not eating meat! grrrrrr…